So i have had a lot going on. I feel life right now is extremely chaotic in the sense that i barely have time to decipher what exactly is going on. So first off, I have been in the hospital since last Monday, which was Oct. 19 and it wasnt because of my uncle. This time was my grandma. She got extremely sick. Since i am the eldest and since i am in charge of everyone i ended up with her on the hospital. I haven't been more scared in my life. My grandmother had gotten the flu, but she ended throwing up. Doctors scared the hell out of me saying that she had the swine flu and that she had to be quarantined. I nearly fainted when they told me that. I was shocked, I mean, you havent slept all night and doctors come to the ER and tell you at 3 am that she has the swine flu, it was a shocker. I was taken completely by surprise. They did a bunch of test on her and well they came up with another story that she might have pneumonia. At this point i did not know what to think. So, i had to stay sleep over at hospital for 3 nights. In the end she just had a bad case of the flu. I came home with her on Friday, but she is still weak, she can barely walk, I want to be a nurse when i grow up and now im a personalized nurse 24/7. Im exhausted, this weekend, well it was rough but i went to go see Paranormal Activity. It was scary, i havent had a movie frighten me for a while...lol....confession here....it creep me out that at night i am kinda creeped out...lol....well my grandma is well for now, still weak, but she is recovering. As for me, problems seem to be piling up.
So last night i couldnt go to sleep and well i noticed that its October 26, a month since my heart was torn into pieces. Oh you should of seen me last night. My head ended up hurting at 3 in the morning for the crying i had been doing since 1 in the morning, it was bad, real bad, i just cried with all my heart, soul, and body into the tears. It was bad. I have a bad case of puffy and red eyes today. Worst case, i had a dream about him, it was what i want, him. I dont know what is going to happen but i do know that i want him back, to love him and treasure him. I keep asking my self why i love the one person who hurt me that most. I am supposed to walk away and bid farewell, but i cant. I guess time heals wounds right? TIME.....
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